Age: 18 year 1 months 14 days

Yeah, I don’t feel better after sleeping. My hair is still awful and things are still bad. Lovely huh? God, how can things be better today? I’ve avoided you like mad. I also can’t believe how much I care about my hair. I’m pretty shallow.

I will live and it will grow and I’ll have to make the best of it.

I’ve missed redacted this weekend. You know that I thought about him a million times. He has a lot of big decisions to make, I want him to make the right ones even if that means that your will is for him and the business. That is a safe way to go, but if it’s your way you’ll bless him eternally.

He’ll make the right decision; he’ll choose your path. Every choice is hard though, there’s nothing pleasant about them. Unless you convince the entire band to forget the business and stick to music than redacted’s choices stink to pick from.

I hope that he had a better weekend than I did at least, but he has a lot more to be upset about. He should have turned to you instead of running away like I did. At least he would have been doing the right thing in the midst of awful circumstances.

I decided that I probably want to marry him again this weekend? I said “ the only thing that could make this weekend good would be if he asked me out”.   I know it’s silly.  You are the only one who will fulfill me. I want to be happy and you, and what happens in light of redacted won’t matter in light of that.

I’m sorry for running away into dreams. I’ll wait for you to bring the guy to me.

Be with redacted though in see him through his decision. Let him know he’s doing the right thing ( or the wrong one).

I give today to you. I give my bad attitudes, my pessimistic outlook, my fears and concerns etcetera to you. Isn’t that nice of me?  No, I will try to be nice and behave according to your will in my life. So how would you have me spend my time now?

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