Age: 17 years 10 months 7 days
Oops, it’s been awhile. I did read day 3 of Purpose Driven Life but I skipped the past two days. Day 3, I didn’t write anything in here obviously. I’m not going to quit trying to catch up. Well that 40 day thing lasted a long time. God, sorry I fell asleep on you the past few nights, but in a way I am thankful. I’ve wanted more than anything to spend the time with you! That’s the truth. I’ve been so busy, but with work. And works been going so well. I’m glad for the break for this next week. This time to relax and spend time with friends at my cottage and then to watch some great movies at The Waterfront Film Festival. I’m very excited.
I don’t feel bad about skipping those purpose days. Why not? Because even though I skipped reading a book I was waiting for you. We talked during those days, you taught me things, we had fun, and I did give you my time. I did force myself to sleep one night because I was depressed. Maybe that was too nice. But I was depressed because I didn’t get to spend the amount of time I wanted to with you. That’s the truth. I should have spent time with you those nights instead of giving up, but I don’t feel bad about it.
Today is my relaxer day. I have a few hours to spend with you and to read before I take redacted to the festival and then go see redacted at the Battle of the Bands. I want the whole day to relax, but it’s not going to happen. I’m happy for the few hours. I want you to come with me everywhere today though. You up to go to Festival again? And I know you’ll be at the Battle of the Bands.
I want to talk about last night. I went to festival with redacted, redacted, redacted, redacted, redacted, and redacted. I had the most fun there. I haven’t had that much fun in so long. I saw two great bands the redacted and shoot I forget the name right now. I saw redacted and her boy redacted at the concert and laughed with her forever about stupid things. I had so much fun with redacted. We actually talked and laughed together. We found a few things we agree on. It was wonderful. I don’t think he hates me or finds me super annoying anymore. That sucks when I thought that only because I respect him as a person so much.
Then there was redacted. It’s wonderful, I can’t daydream about him because things are so much better when I’m actually with him than they are in my daydreams. It’s amazing. I can’t believe how wonderful and can’t imagine being happier with anyone else.. If you have someone even better than him for me you’re crazy because he’s the most wonderful guy on the planet. I could not do better. And I really do believe that you want me with him. Seriously though, last night I got butterflies in my stomach at least 15 times standing next to him. I got shivers when he brushed up against me. And I still had the most fun in the entire world with him. It’s indescribable how great being with him was. I can’t even say how happy, alive I am around him. Our relationship is exactly the kind of relationship I want to engage in. I remember you when I’m around him. God, it’s mind-blowing that he could actually be the one I am going to marry, to think that I’d be lucky enough to spend the rest of my life with someone I love so much as life itself. God, let me marry redacted. I want to be with him. I can’t imagine life without him, and I don’t want to. Continue to be with us. Nothing further is going to happen in this relationship without you. So tell me now if you don’t want this, because I want to serve you, and again, if this dishonors you tell me so I may try not to fall further in love. I could write about him forever, but I’d rather be with him. You seriously do want us together, don’t you? You are too funny.
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